Elections Then and Now

Not everything is left to chance or fate. For instance, elections in the USSR of old didn't include many surprises.  Voters then had the right to vote either for or against the unopposed candidate that had been pre-selected by the Communist party.  Predictably, under such beneficial conditions candidates usually received about 99 percent of the vote.

Stalin casting his vote.

The caption reads "For the people's happiness!"

Meanwhile, I asked Spanish Teacher Tanya about her voting experiences back in USSR times.   "What?' she said, "There weren't any elections then. Are you kidding?"

Her husband Lawyer Misha quickly contradicted her: "Of course there were! Don't you remember how as an incentive for voting you could buy food and other stuff at the polling center when there was nothing anywhere else?"

"Oh!" Tanya exclaimed, "Yes! That's right. You could! No, it wasn't cheaper, it was just that you could get it at all!  I still have a towel that I bought there years ago. It must be 25 years old! I forgot completely. I guess that's because they weren't REAL elections... Hmm, kind of like now!"

About those elections now, that is to say, the last parliamentary election that was held back in December, well, some things just don't add up.  Like the percentages in the Rostov region, where votes allocated per party totaled 146%.

The newscaster eyes the voting results for the Rostov region where the percentage cast for each party is listed.  When added up, the total is an impossible 146%.

This  mathematical impossibility has been interpreted as proof that the election was rigged in favor of Putin's United Russia, which is shown here as receiving 58.99% of the vote.  Next comes the Communist Party of the Russian Federation with 32.96%.  For some folks, the old days were no doubt better.

Later that evening, Student Igor tells me a joke that's making the rounds:

Barack Obama is concerned about the upcoming U.S. presidential election, so he calls the Russian Vote Counting Manager and asks for assistance.

"No worries," says the manager, "we'll hop right on it."

A few weeks later, Obama calls back for an update.

Says the Vote Counting Manager, "We have everything under control.  Putin is winning in all fifty states."

[originally published 19 January 2011]